Monday, September 14, 2009
With Some Certainty - It Too Will Pass.
When I was laid off in April, I treated every day as though I were going to work. And I did. I was in a temporary career now looking for work. I didn't want to take any time off because it was important for my self esteem and family financials, that I procure work quickly.
I had promised myself to GET OVER IT (Great Eagle's song-lyrics). As with the death of someone close, everyone in some small or large way will go through 7 stages of grief. Yep, even with the loss of a job. Although the stages may be brief, even just a thought but, all do experience some form of each of these:
1. SHOCK & DENIAL
2. PAIN & GUILT-
3. ANGER & BARGAINING
4. "DEPRESSION", REFLECTION, LONELINESS
5. THE UPWARD TURN
6. RECONSTRUCTION & WORKING THROUGH
7. ACCEPTANCE & HOPE (aka CLOSURE)
Some take longer than others. Fortunately, I had closure quickly. I wanted it quickly. I wanted to put my best foot forward and show the world that I'm not steppin'-off.
The closure doesn't make the financial situation any easier. The unemployment checks cover only about 80% of the mortgage and my wife Marie works but barely enough paycheck to cover all other expenses. She is a fitness trainer and feeling the economic crunch just as much as everyone else. And believe me, we are no where near an extravagant lifestyle BUT do have a very nice home, ergo, big mortgage. I say this because the biggest and hardest part is the financial bleakness that attempts to drag you down daily. I read somewhere the # 1 argument/altercation/issues among couples, or at least in the top 3 is FINANCE.
We on the other hand don't argue about finance but some times bury our heads in our hands. We discuss and try to figure the next phase of "What if". It can drive you buggy. Marie (my wife) is unbelievable. She has a plan A,B,C all of which are excellent plans. She must be left-brain but tremendous ability to use the right-brain. She can also find the silver lining in anything. No really! I recall (but, I may be exaggerating) as we were taking the dog for a walk, I had noticed someone did not pick up after their dog. I was beside myself (btw, I think I've lost an inch in height. You notice things like that when your beside yourself). I said " I couldn't believe that someone let their dog crap in someone else's driveway and not clean it up." Well, Marie of course, calmed me down and said "But Honey, think how the dog felt." I finished the walked.
You know, I dislike the end of summer days because frankly, I am a morning person. If the sun is up at 5:30am, I'm up. But recently the sunrise has occurred around 6:30a. I just haven't been jumping out of bed with any pep as I feel like I have been putting so much emphasis on procuring the job that I have forgotten to also enjoy my wife and family. I went down stairs, made coffee, kissed my wife when she came down and told her, with certainty, someones calling this week.
I mentioned in the previous blog the phone would ring. Didn't I? Well, it did, 2 times. I returned the calls to find out that 2 companies want to speak to me.
Okay, now it's time to get get my suit readied( and my head on straight).